A Very Klapper Week

Guess how many days I saw The Klapper this week? 6. I know. What the fuck is going on in NH!

Gotta say, that boy is trying hard to make up for past bullshit. I'm going to go ahead and detail this out..

So Tuesday night I stopped by his house to cry into a Keystone light about how fucked up the piloting of my new study went (seriously, so fucked up..my friend had to keep whispering in my ear "say it with me, this is why we pilot. Say it louder. Like you mean it"), and we got to talking about stuff and how he's completely terrified of letting me down. I believe he used the phrase "it makes me want to kill myself when I let you down". Right sentiment, maybe don't use "want to kill myself" around a psych person.

So I went home and wrote him a sweet email that was like...chill the fuck out, things are GOING to come up and I'm not going to hate you or dump you because you have a busy life. BUT, in my exhaustion (no sleep for several day because I've been sick) I thought it would help him to understand where I'm coming from my explaining the difference in how this relationship felt to me before and how it feels now..ya know...to help him understand why having to cancel on me now feels different than it did before and why it's okay for him to relax a bit. Woops. Apparently I described the past year with him in terms that haunted his soul. For the sake of those curious I said "So before, whether this is true or not, I felt like...you thought of me as some girl you were banging in Hanover to get through your time here, and that you just needed to put in the bare minimum to keep me engaged enough that we could keep having sex and not waste any extra time on me."

So we touched on that briefly Wednesday night, and then he went out to celebrate his roommates' birthday, but then I got a semi-drunk text at 9 pm asking if I wanted to come out to the bar and meet all his friends. I felt like death and looked like shit, but, I figured if I didn't take this chance now he would probably not do it again, so I cleaned myself up and went out to meet some friends. OMFG. Apparently business students don't do any work because there were about 45 people there all HAMMERED on a Wednesday night. Hammered.

But it turned out being so great. I would walk up to someone with Klapper and they would be like "OMG we have heard so much about you! We're FINALLY getting to meet you!", and most of them were actually pretty awesome. Some were total d-bags...ya know..business school. It was also nice because at times Klapper would be off talking to someone and I would just go meet other people or talk to his friends, and I think it was good for him to realize that I am not an anti-social retard and am perfectly capable of handling myself without him in a social setting. The only annoying point was that Klapper was kinda drunkish, and was feeling really upset about that email, so his friend would come over and he would look really sad and I wanted to be like "bitch please, knock that shit off in public and get over it". But oh well.

So at some point his roommate succumbed to his "alcohol-induced narcolepsy", which was hilarious. He falls down onto a chair next to me and passes the fuck out for a minute. Comes back to life for just long enough to lift his arm and sweep off the dozens of glasses and bottles on the table. And then passes back out. Pure magic.

As I was the only sober person, I offered to take his friend home who had been begging me to bang him since I arrived. But he wouldn't get in the car and kept trying to sleep on the sidewalk, and nobody could get him to cooperate. So..I did the only thing I could think of...which was to start stripping off my clothes in the middle of the street in the dead of winter and telling him to get in the car so we could go home and bang. Not only did it work, but apparently that basically cemented my status as awesome for Klapper's friends.

So we drop off his friend (who, hilariously, got in the house and started stripped to reveal he was wearing a bathing suit instead of underwear...) and get back in the car to go back to the bar, and The Klapper wants to talk about "us". And how upset he was about the fact that we dated over a year and I didn't think he gave a shit about me (true). And that he is in love with me, and hates that he can only say it when he's drunk but means it (awww?). Sigh, and then he starts crying. But it was actually totally adorable, although I had to tell him to stop being a bitch so we can go back to the bar. But it was a definite moment, and we hashed out a bunch of relationship shit.

More time in the bar, more of his friends thinking I'm awesome, we give a few of them rides home and somehow it's 1:00 am, on a Wednesday, when I am sick. But..there was clearly still some stuff to talk about from the car, so I go in and we just talk about EVERYTHING for an hour. All the stuff I've ever wanted to ask, I ask. Serious bonding moments people. And then we had sex for, no joke, a fucking hour...until finally it was 3 am and I really needed to leave (even though he begged me to stay :))

And that was Wednesday. And then he came over again on Thursday night for our standing Archer watching date. I was a little nervous because ya know...you have one of those nights when you talk about feelings and people are drunk and then it might be awkward when everyone is sober, but it wasn't like that at all. Sweetest moment was when he said something like "I'm sorry I was a shitshow last night, and I want you to know that I don't need to be drunk to tell you I love you. I love you.". Swoon-ish.

I should also note that he tried to put together a double date for us and his friend, but I ended up bailing because I think his friend is a d-bag and wanted to do laundry instead, but he tried!

So that was Thursday, and then Friday I went over and we baked pretzels and then went out with some of his friends for the night. I also got to see pictures of his ex-girlfriends, which is terribly masochistic but I was curious. I think I'm definitely hotter than any of them ;)

And that ends my week of Klapper. I know this was an exception-kinda week, but it was really great and made me very happy. I'm sure our busy schedules will prevent this kind of thing from happening frequently, but I'm glad that at this point his friends "won't stop talking about how awesome I am", and we've pushed a lot of the relationship bullshit around enough that we can just move past it.

Other than that, I got my crazy ass smoking study up and running this Saturday and it went....umm..okay? Okay fine, I drank alone on Saturday night to get over it, but I'm working towards academic rockstar and this is a small step. This week should be more of that and just a ton of work and meetings, but I think things are going okay.

And for those of you playing at home, don't worry, I'm sure Klapper will fuck up something royally soon enough and I'll do more hate-blogging. We had an amusing exchange recently about such that went like this:

Me: Blog something blah blah blah.

Klapper: You have a blog?

Me: Um..yeah..you know this. We've talked about this. I mentioned it on our first date.

Klapper: Do you write about me in it?

Me: .....obviously.

Klapper: ......

Me: I mean...

Klapper: Do you write....bad things about me?

Me: Well...not...currently.

Klapper: Can I read your blog?

Me: Absolutely not.

Klapper: Ha..okay fine..I probably don't want to read it anyway.

Me: Definitely.. I can't have you knowing about all the other guys I've been fucking.

Klapper: Oh you're silly....